Traveler
by Suna Kurai
Summary: In the midst of all the destruction, he found a woman in a red kimono...
1. Kaito

_I woke up not knowing what lay ahead of me today._ It was the usual day. _I woke to my siblings quarreling over an orange and a banana._

"Ne, Rin, Len," I said rubbing my eyes, "What is it this time?"

"Oniichan, Len ate my last orange!" Rin whined

"But Rin ate my last banana first!" Len whined

"Did not…!"

"Yeah you did!"

"Hey, I'll go out in the city and buy some fresh apples and bananas for you two so stop whining about it, okay?" _I smiled then ruffled their heads._

They smiled as well and hugged me. We had unusual hair. _Blondes were rare in this village and I was the only one with blue hair._ Pinkettes, I loved. _I looked over at the picture frame beside me and smiled seeing me beside my fiancé, Luka._

_I got up and wore my blue scarf. Then I went out the door_.

"I'll be back," I ruffled their hair again while smiling before turning around and leaving.

_As soon as the door closed,_ _I heard women whispering._ I think they were gossiping with each other. _I'm not as low as to eavesdrop but I was curious._ They were talking loudly so that means it wasn't about any one of the people they know. It must've been local news.

Curious, I walked up to them and asked what they were talking about.

"_They say a geisha has been murdered_," That surprised me. _Murder…? That was very rare. It was very rare in these parts of the village._

"Which house?" I asked involuntarily.

"The one beside Megurine's," That worried me. It was around here.

"_The culprit left behind a purple scarf_," Said one

"_The woman was murdered very carefully as not to harm her beauty and figure_," said the other

"_The green haired woman was unfortunate. She was only 16 years old_," I was shocked at this. Could this be Luka-chan's Miku? Was it the beautiful Miku she trained and shaped into art?

_She was so kind and gentle. Who could ever want to steal the life of such young talent?_

"Excuse me," I smiled at the two ladies. They waved goodbye to me. I was a very nice guy in the village. _I loved children. It was mainly because of my siblings but they were already fourteen._ I wonder why they still act like that.

Oh well, it's cute and suits them well, especially Rin.

I went straight for the market to pick out the best oranges and bananas I could find. Maybe I could even afford the luxury of buying myself a treat for once but nothing is really good enough for my tastes. The best thing I've ever tasted was accidentally frozen milk mixed with fruits or maybe a watermelon.

It was the absolute best. Though, I always have to wait for winter to try it again.

_The market man knew me well since I was there nearly every day. It was again because of Rin and Len. Well, I loved my siblings. They were all I had since our parents died. I swore to protect them until I die._

_That won't happen for a long time so I'm pretty sure it's nothing to be worried about._ I smile while walking back to my house.

"Rin, Len, I'm home," I called out as I entered. I was greeted the usual way. They would run and hug me, I would ruffle their hair then they'd take the bag filled with their fruits. I could just smile.

I did buy a watermelon. It was just a slice. It was big enough for me and enough for breakfast.

Well, seeing the sun now, it'd probably be my lunch as well.

I ate the last of the watermelon and went to throw out the inedible part. I didn't have a job today. It was next week so _I can play with the twins in peace._

_That was what I actually thought._

"Kaito—" _I greeted her with a kiss. Yes, it was my beautiful fiancé, Luka_. _She was probably going to tell me about Miku being murdered. _

"_Take him away," she said. What was she talking about? I don't understand._

"Hey, Luka, what's wrong?" _Two village officials showed up on either side of my fiancé._

"Don't act like you don't know." She looked angry. "You killed her! I didn't think you'd be as sloppy as to leaving a scarf!"

"Nani…?" _I really had absolutely no idea what was going on. Then I remembered the scarf from the geisha's murder._ "You're accusing me of murdering Miku?!" I exclaimed.

"Who else wears a scarf in this season?!" she yelled. _Her eyes burned into my very soul_. She was furious. _But how could she blame me of all people? I was her fiancé!_

"My scarf is blue!" I pulled my scarf off and held it directly in front of her eyes. I too was angry.

"It's too late for that," _The guards gripped me on each side. They were about to take me away. My fate was death. I won't be able to protect my siblings anymore._

"Wait! It isn't me I swear!" I struggled to get out of their grasps. No! This can't be happening! I have to protect my siblings! I just have to! I yelled it over and over again. "Let me go! I'm innocent!"

"Luka-ne," Len tugged on her kimono, "Where are you taking Oniichan?"

The mournful look on her face I'd never forget.

"I'll be taking you two in, no need to worry," she said.

That relieved me. _She was going to take care of my siblings when I was gone._ I smiled. _I accept my fate._

The guards simply took me away as Luka stared. _I was left in a prison cell to wait for my punishment by dusk._ It was cold, dark and empty. I didn't belong here. I'm the nice guy. I'm the guy who's easy to talk to and can't say no to anyone who asks me a favor.

_It wasn't me_.

It's not like the guards would listen if I called out so I don't really have a choice. I can only pray that they'd find the real culprit before they kill me. That rarely happens though. I'm gonna die today. I can't believe that watermelon was my last meal. Now I'm itching for that frozen milk with fruits.

I leaned on the cold hard wall and sat down in a corner. The sun didn't shine much here. Now I did wish I had a job today. Whenever I get a job, Luka doesn't find me. I wonder how the twins are doing now.

I hope they're not too much trouble for her especially Rin. She's kind of loud and annoying in a way. I find it funny. Now, I wish I could've heard her laugh before I left with the guards.

Hours had passed. I hadn't moved an inch. I even fell asleep.

"Kaito, get up. You shall walk with us to the center of the town where the noose is," said a guard, "You shall be hung for your crime of murdering Hatsune Miku."

"I have to be executed in front of the whole village?!" I exclaimed

"Do you have any complaints?" He attempted to hit me with his whip. I knew better than to experience more pain before I die.

"So I have to go now?" I asked.

"Yes,"

"As in, right now…?"

"Yes,"

"You're not gonna give me a meal first?"

He showed me the whip again.

"Suimasen," I said, "Please, I don't want to get hurt before I die,"

"Smart," _he opened the cage known as my cell._

_I stepped out and got ready for my sentence. I knew it was the end. I walked along the village streets soberly. _The people who used to admire my kindness now looked at me in disbelief.

_I wished I could see the twins now that it was the end._ Luka would take care of them. I just know it.

_I heard a woman screaming._

"Let go of me! _That man is innocent!_ Hey! Please! Believe me! That man is innocent!" _I was intrigued. A woman was shouting about my innocence? That was highly unlikely._

_She was silenced. I saw her running away_. It'd probably be best to leave her alone. That's what they did.

We passed by an alley where _I saw a purple haired samurai oppressing my siblings._

_I fought my way through the guards gripping me tightly._ I struggled with them holding me down. He was gonna hurt them! _I'm still alive! I can't let anyone hurt my siblings!_ They kept trying to hold me down. Why am I even covering for Miku's murderer?

_It wasn't me._

I punched one last official before I finally got to run towards their direction.

_It wasn't me._

I hoped I'd make it because I saw the samurai raising his sword.

_It wasn't me._

I'm almost there! I just have to—

_It wasn't me!_

_I punched his face hard and pushed his back to the wall. The impact was hard enough that I could hear it but I didn't care. The samurai looked up at me and I said with a stern and threatening voice, "Don't dare touch them!"_

He simply looked up at me. _I didn't see what happened next. The guards dragged me away in front of my very own siblings. Stop crying, please. Please just stop crying. Oniichan will go to heaven. Onesan will take care of you._

_I love you._

"It wasn't me!" I kept on yelling.

They continued to drag me along. _Finally, I reached the center of the city. I reached the noose._ It was over. I was going to die.

"_Stop all this! He is not the culprit!" I realized it was my fiancé who yelled._

"Luka…!"

_Then everything burned down before my very eyes._

_I ran searching for my siblings. _ I searched everywhere. I looked through every corner of the burning village in the midst of all the panic and the chaos.

_I saw my fiancé escape with them from afar. I went to follow but something hit my head and great darkness engulfed me._

XXXXXX

_Light returned to my eyes and I saw the destruction before me. There was no one left alive in the village. Even so, I looked for survivors. _I need to find someone, anyone.

_It's enough though. I know my siblings are alive._

I went around and searched the entire village reduced to ashes and debris overnight. It was dawn by now. _I searched for someone, anyone._

_I needed to find someone to help me look for my family and fiancé._

Then there she was. I didn't recognize her at first. _In the midst of all that destruction, what I found was…_

"_A woman in a red kimono…"_


	2. Meiko

_My eyesight adjusted to a line of blue. Then when they were finally opened, a blur of flesh, black, red and blue welcomed me._

_What had I been doing?_

_That man had been asking me something. He was yelling but I couldn't hear. Everything, my sight, my hearing, was blurred._

_Then I remembered._

I immediately sit up from my position ignoring the blue figure beside me and began to yell. "Luka…!" I looked around blindly as my vision was slowly coming to me. "Luka…!" I yelled again.

Then my eyes finally perceived the destruction before me. He succeeded. His crime has been covered up. My brother was murdered and not even given a chance to be honored like Miku.

Tears began to fall from my eyes. Kiyoteru-niisan was dead.

It was all because of one murder.

XXXXXX

_I opened the door to my friend's house. I found her lying there in a pool of her own blood. Her green hair was stained with fresh blood. Blood was smeared on her face as well though aside from that fact, her figure and beauty was untouched._

_That makes me wonder._ I _have to go tell Luka right away._

_I ran through the village to Luka's house._ I didn't knock. I opened the door to find her putting clothes on. She must've just finished bathing.

"Close the door!" she yelled furiously with a blush. I too was taken aback and closed the door immediately. I waited patiently for her to finish putting clothes on.

"What do you want?" she had that irritated tone in her voice. Well, who wouldn't be irritated after her friend almost exposes her body in public?

"_Miku has been murdered." I told her._

"What?!" her expression immediately changed and _she pulled my hand to the direction of Miku's house._

_She opened the door and found our best friend's dead body._

_Luka is to be married in two weeks to man of blue. I don't remember his name but I'm pretty sure they dubbed him as a really nice guy._ He's probably some big softie or something.

_Luka has been searching the room for anything that could point to the murderer._

_The man she's to be married to always had a scarf on, even in the summer. It is said that his happy demeanor was enough to shield him from the hot and cold weather. I don't know, those were rumors anyway, but it seemed true knowing how Luka would act whenever she'd describe him. Though, he'd just be an annoying fluffy guy to me._

_She was willing to abandon him for Miku._

"A scarf…?" a look of disbelief came across her perfect face. Tears filled her eyes. "No, this can't be, it can't Kaito, it just can't," tears continued to fall.

"Hey, don't jump to conclusions;" I told her, "Judging from the rumors, it may not be him—"

"Damare!" she yelled. I was silenced. "I'll be taking this," she said as she took the said to be 'scarf' away. She went on ahead and I took one last look at Miku before I followed.

There was this long grueling silence between us. Luka was never this silent.

"Luka," I began. "I don't think it's him. I mean, from the way you tell me about him, I don't think he'd be able to do anything like this,"

"What do you know? You're always out there drinking sake with some random guys! You don't know what he's doing!"

"He's your fiancé! You know him better than anyone! Think about it," I reassured her. She smiled.

"Of course, how can I think that it could be Kaito of all people?" I was relieved to see her like that, "Though, Miku's murderer has to be punished,"

"I'll keep my eye out for the damn murderer," I said, "He's gonna get it real hard," I showed her my fist. She giggled at that.

"It's not proper for a lady in a kimono to do that in public," she smiled.

"Eh, I'm not a geisha so who cares?"

I waved goodbye as the sun set and went straight for my house. Kiyoteru-niisan was making dinner today. I smiled at that. I didn't like cooking that much. I was too lazy. I'd rather have him make me dinner and have a bottle of sake beside me.

"Tadaima," I called out as I happily entered the house grabbing my bottle of sake.

"Meiko," my brother smiled, "You may have your sake in peace,"

"I believe that you have certainly made me happy today, niisan,"

"Anything for you," he smiled, "Today's teaching was fun. Miku will grow up to be a fine teacher,"

"Kiyoteru-nii," I said after downing a gulp of sake, "Miku has been murdered as soon as she went home." I regret telling bad news on a supposed to be peaceful sake drinking night.

I saw my brother's face. His eyes widened at the news. He had just been laughing with her earlier and he finds out she's been murdered the second she got home.

"I didn't want to tell you since she was your best student," I couldn't look him in the eye.

"I see," he said, "Well, I hope her soul finds eternal rest," we ate in silence. I didn't touch my sake after that. My brother noticed this and smiled. "I can always find another best student! Go ahead, enjoy your sake! Miku wouldn't want us to be mourning over her too much,"

I found a smile at that time. My brother truly is selfless and selfish in a way. He hates seeing me sad or even worried. I don't what I'd do without him.

When I finished eating, I went to my room and slept soundly.

XXXXXX

I woke up to my brother's voice. "Doushite no desu ka, Kiyoteru-nii…?" I said rubbing my eyes. What was he doing waking me up early in the morning?

"Meiko, I'll be off now," That was it?! "Luka is here to see you, you might want to get up now," he smiled and left. I immediately shot up out of bed.

"Matte, Kiyoteru-nii…!" I called before he opened the door to exit my room, "Are you alright?"

He simply smiled. "The past is the past, Meiko. I'm happy for Luka and her fiancé. He's surely a lucky man." He then left my room.

I slipped on my red kimono before I went to see Luka.

"So, did you find out who murdered her?" I said as I entered our receiving room.

"I can't be surer," she replied.

"Let's hear it then," I crossed my arms over my chest.

"It's him," she still held the scarf in her hands.

"What?" I was surprised, "What do you mean it's him?!"

"I asked a few elderly people on Kaito's parents," she said, "They died around fourteen years ago when his siblings were born."

"What does that have to do with anything?" I asked. Seriously, she sure knows how to ramble.

"They died because of Miku's father," that caught my attention. "He might have been out for revenge and he must've been planning it the day I introduced him to her," Tears fell from her perfect eyes.

It was a reasonable excuse. Anyone who was supposed to be the happiest person in the village was supposed to have a little darkness or else he wouldn't be human. Though, I still doubted the fact. I'm sure she did too.

"_I want Miku to be brought to justice,"_

That shocked me. "You don't mean—"

"_I love him," she said as she clutched the scarf to her chest, "But I have to do what's right." Tears fell continuously. Luka never cried like that. How I wished it wasn't this man. I can't bear seeing her cry any longer._

"_Miku's funeral will be held in a few days." She said, "I've told the officials about this and we'll be setting out for his house today,"_

"_What about your wedding?" I asked._

"_I guess I'll never be happily married," she smiled as tears still fell from her eyes._ She wiped them away before leaving. This made me smirk.

I guess Kiyoteru-nii still had a chance. Though I felt sorry for the poor guy she'd been engaged with. He really seemed to be a nice guy. Even I couldn't believe it was him. I still doubt it but she had solid evidence and she knew him better than anyone. I had no right to speak.

_I went out and did my usual work._ I went about the village trying to get the people to see Luka's show. She holds a show of geishas every summer solstice festival. It was probably next week and I needed to invite people who weren't just sick perverts drinking sake on the side and molesting the women. We wouldn't want our performers molested, now do we?

I handed out fliers or something like that. The people were excited. Luka's shows always featured songs I wrote. Those songs were stories. The women act them out of dance them while Luka and I sing. I smiled at the fact that people enjoy hearing us and like what I've written.

_By the time I was finished, I'm pretty sure Kiyoteru-nii was home. I went back home not knowing what lay ahead of me that day. I opened the door to an empty house._

He's probably just late. Maybe a student wanted to be tutored or he's looking for another best student. He was looking for one that would live up to Miku's standards of selflessness. I waited for him patiently as I drank a bottle of sake.

_It seemed an hour has passed and he still hasn't gotten home. I started to get worried and drank the last drop of my sake. I threw the bottle away and began to look for my brother._

I see they were starting to show the murderer off to the people. I have to see what he looks like.

Well, he was a mesh of blue. His hair, his eyes, hell, even his scarf was blue. Though, seeing his face, it looked really innocent. He looked like a really nice guy. It made me doubt Luka's theory even more and I'm sure she doubts it as well.

I'm pretty sure she hopes the original murderer would show up out of guilt and her fiancé would be released. I don't think the criminal would actually do that though.

_I continued to search for my brother until I heard something like blood splattering. It was faint and I thought I was imagining it when I passed by a dark alley. I decided to ignore it but then I heard it again._

_And again, and again; it was tearing through my ear drums._

_I had to know._

_I peaked and saw a purple haired samurai cutting someone to bits and pieces. It wasn't just someone though; it was my brother, Kiyoteru-nii._

I watched him yell words to my brother drowned out by the noise of the villages watching Luka's fiancé march to the center of the city along with the officials.

"See what you did?!" I could barely hear him but I understood what he said, "You let me kill off my precious Miku! I could've accepted the fact that she rejected me but I saw you with her! I'll slash you to bits and pieces until there's nothing left of your existence!"

I knew that voice anywhere! It was the samurai! It was Gakupo! It was Miku's admirer. Damn, what a pedo. He's a twenty-four year old man and Miku is sixteen. Seriously…!

_At the sight of my brother being minced to bits, I ran off crying. I have to find her. I have to tell her that it wasn't him._

I saw the officials. They passed by with the mesh of blue in between them. Guards were blocking them but I had to tell them that it wasn't him.

I pushed through the crowd of people desperately hoping they'd believe me.

_It wasn't him._

I finally got through with a guard in front of me.

_It wasn't him._

I took a look at the innocent man. Luka would suffer if he'd been killed.

_It wasn't him._

"Sir," I began, "He wasn't responsible for the murder of Hatsune Miku. That man is innocent!"

_It wasn't him._

"Are you making this up?" he asked, "You might be an accomplice. We only believe the one who reported this to us,"

_It wasn't him._

"I'm telling the truth!" I yelled. "It isn't him! You have to let him go!" People began to stare. I had to keep my ground.

_It wasn't him._

"How many times do I have to tell you that we'd only believe the actual woman who told us about Hatsune Miku's murder?" The guard began to sound irritated.

_It wasn't him!_

He ordered the guards to take me away. They thought I was insane and just needed a little rest. I fought back. I struggled. Why was I so hard to believe?! Was it because I was known as a drunken delinquent?!

_It wasn't him! _

"Let go of me! _That man is innocent!_Hey! Please! Believe me! That man is innocent!" I kept yelling but they wouldn't let me go and continued to try to calm me down. How many times do I have to spell it out for them, damn it?!

_It wasn't freaking him!_

They were gripping me on all sides then I decided to look for Luka and hope it won't be too late when I find her and tell her the truth. I struggled and I got out of their grip.

_They left me alone. I was lucky._

_I then began my search for my best friend. I ran as fast as I can. I can't waste any time. As seconds pass, an innocent man is in danger of suffering the fate he doesn't deserve!_

_I then bumped into a pink mesh. It was her! I had no time to lose._

"Meiko—"

"_Your fiancé didn't murder Miku, the samurai, Gakupo did!"_ I gripped her by the shoulders. It felt like time stopped at that very moment. Luka's facial expression was too pained and regretful to look at. Even so, I endured staring at her straight in the eye for her to realize that she has to save him.

_She picked it up and ran towards the center of the city._

Now that's settled, _I ran home and began packing my things. I'm pretty sure that samurai would leave after those murders. I need to have my revenge._ _I clutched a knife in my hands then suddenly my house was on fire. I looked out the window and saw his silhouette come out of my brother's room's window._

_Was he planning to burn everything down?!_

_I had no time to lose! I had to escape!_ I tried to look for a way out where there was no fire blocking my way. I had a really hard time finding my way out.

_The knife pierced my right palm leaving a line bleeding on it._ I dropped the knife. I didn't have time to tend to that wound though I knew it would continue to bleed for a couple more hours. I had to hurry up and escape!

_With nothing left, I jumped off my window._ The moment that I jumped off people pushed me all over the place. _There was too much panic and chaos to get through._

_I can't breathe._

_I can't die here. I have to get my revenge._

I saw Luka escape along with twins. I have to follow her but there were too many people. I'm getting suffocated.

_I can't breathe._

_I can't freaking breathe!_

_I felt darkness creeping into my very soul._

XXXXXX

"_I have to get my revenge on him even if it costs me my life!"_ I said between sobs as the mesh of blue could only stare at my broken state.

Heck, not even sake can cheer me up now.

"_He murdered her, he killed my brother, and he burned my house first…!"_

"You know who murdered Miku?" that was when I finally understood what he said. _My right hand landed on a glass shard which reopened the wound on it and it began to bleed once again._

"Yes, it was a samurai named Gakupo. He also murdered that last of my family." I desperately tried to stop my hand from bleeding.

_I heard the sound of tearing flesh._

My eyes widened as _I watched the blue mesh cut his left palm with a glass shard. He looked at me and smile. He entwined his bleeding hand with my bleeding hand._

"_Let's make a promise then,"_ he said, _"I'll help you get your revenge and you'll help me find my siblings and fiancé,"_ I saw bruises and blood on his face. I stared at our mixed blood slowly dripping.

_With that, the blood compact was sealed._


	3. Miku

_I was known as a kind and beautiful woman._ People admired me for being such. _I was known as living and moving art. That was what I was. That was what they defined I'd be for the rest of my life. I'm happy with what I am doing but what I truly want is to be as selfless as to share my knowledge about the world with others._ I want to be a teacher to children who is loved and admired not for her beauty or her grace or her poise. _I want to be loved and admired for sharing with those children_. I want to be loved like how Kiyoteru-sensei is. I want to follow in his footsteps and so I will. _In the mean time, I will remain as art._

_I grip my fan in one hand and my umbrella in the other. This serves as a sign of my profession_. Luka-chan has always told me that I never needed make-up anyway so my face remained bare. _I was different from all the other geisha. They wore thick make-up that covered their faces and I did not._

_I walk carefully as to not ruining my grace and poise they all admire me for. My smile never vanished. My expression never faltered. It was nice to be loved and admired. Though, it was never the way I wanted it to be._

I met Meiko-san through Luka-chan when I was seven years old. That was when I met Kiyoteru-sensei, Meiko-san's older brother and I've always been fascinated with his point of view. In the later years, I've found out that he has become a teacher. I came with Meiko-san once to see him teach and entertain children and from then on, I knew what I wanted to do when I grew up.

_The villagers greeted me. I greeted them back. Today, I was supposed to meet with Luka-chan and Meiko-san. I loved them like sisters. They were the best friends that I could never replace. They were dearest to my heart._

Luka-chan was to be married. It seems that the man of blue she was talking about finally proposed to her. She was going to introduce him to me today.

When I finally got to my destination, I looked around. I found a woman with pink hair next to a man with blue and a scarf worn around his neck. It was them.

I immediately walked up to them. Though, I wonder where Meiko-san is.

"Luka-chan," I smiled as I got there. Luka-chan gave me one of her perfect smiles as well and so did the man of blue. He seemed to be a kind man.

"Miku, I'm so glad you could make it," she smiled, "You're probably wondering where Meiko is."

"In truth, I am," I replied.

"She drank too much sake last night and couldn't make it," she giggled.

I laughed as well. Meiko-san will never change.

"So you're Miku," said the man of blue as he half-kneeled in front of me. "Luka has told me so much about you and it seems she is correct about it all though, I would've really wanted to meet the drunken delinquent," he laughed. This man seemed to have a sense of humor.

"If Meiko were here, she would've hit you with an empty bottle of sake," Luka-chan laughed.

"She isn't here, is she?" the man replied still smiling.

I watched them carefully. They truly were a wonderful pair. They suit each other well. This man of blue, Kaito, helped Luka-chan loosen up even a little bit.

_I spent the rest of the day with them, laughing almost the whole time._ I nearly forgot to keep my poise and grace when Kaito-san offered to give me a piggyback ride and kept telling me to call him Oniichan. I have a feeling he has a soft spot for children. I'm not a child anymore though I feel like one the way he treated me and it felt nice not to be treated as a woman meant to be art every once in a while.

_The day finally ended. It was too fast. I wanted to spend more time with them but I knew that every good thing had to end one way or another._

_The sun hasn't set yet when I watched them leave. I should get home as well. I took my umbrella and started searching the grass for my fan but could not find it anywhere. Then, I stumbled upon someone's feet._ I looked up to see long purple hair in a ponytail on top of a mature and handsome face.

"_Are you looking for this, beautiful miss?" he held out the fan for me to reach._ I blushed. I was embarrassed. This was the first time that somebody else has found one of my belongings. _It wouldn't be so embarrassing, really. What made it embarrassing was that he saw me lose my grace and poise as I tried desperately to find my fan._

I crawled low on the ground to find it. No geisha would ever do that. They would always ask help from the people around them because they were never meant to look improper. I took it from him and said my thank you. I was hoping he wouldn't tell this to anyone.

"Here, let me help you up," he held his hand out for me to take. I took it without hesitation since that was how geisha were supposed to act.

"Good sir, may I please ask you a favor?" I said as I stood up.

"What would that be, good miss?" he was surely a gentleman.

"Please do not tell anyone about this. My image would be ruined if people found out that I crawled on the dirty ground." I told him directly. I begged.

Then he did the least thing I expected he'd do. He laughed. Now, this made me wonder. _Was he laughing at me and my pitiful state? Was he going to ruin my reputation?_ What would Luka-chan say?

"I have no intention of doing that, beautiful miss," he smiled, _"All I want to know is your name."_

_This man wanted to know my name? For what reason did he want my name?_

He laughed. "Forgive me, I haven't introduced myself," he spoke like a true gentleman, "I am Kamui Gakupo, you are?"

"Hatsune Miku," I replied, "I am a geisha,"

"And I am a samurai," he smiled, "Shall I accompany you home?"

"Very well then, good sir," I replied, "If you insist."

And so _I was accompanied home by this man I barely knew._

_Days passed since I met this man. Every day, he came to my house. He never ceased to have a surprise for me._ It would either be sweets, flowers, a hair clip, a new fan or an umbrella. _I've grown close to this man. I wonder if he is in love with someone. I watch him closely every day; this 24 year old man has surely found a woman to stay by his side for the rest of his life. It turns out I was mistaken._

"Gakupo-nii," I began as I was tending to my flower garden with him sitting on a chair watching me, "Is there a woman that caught your eye yet?"

There was a short pause. I looked over at him and he smiled. "Yes, there is one."

"Are you two getting married like Luka-chan and Kaito-nii?" I asked with enthusiasm. I was curious to what kind of woman would catch his eye. I've begun to think of him as an older brother and I want to be there at his wedding like I will be there in Luka-chan's.

"No, she doesn't know of my feelings towards her," he replied.

"What?" I was surprised. Surely, any woman near his age would fall for him. He is so kind and warm. Maybe he should confess to the woman. "Why haven't you told her?"

"Because I'm afraid," he replied, "I'm afraid she might reject me and I'm reconsidering of looking for someone else,"

"Can you give me a hint on her personality or appearance?" I didn't want to make it too obvious that I was too curious about it.

He smiled. "Well," there was this long pause, "I'm afraid that she has a strong personality and faces her personal problems without poise and grace," he laughed.

A strong personality without poise and grace, huh…? I wonder…

Is he talking about Meiko-san?!

He's only met her thrice unlike Luka-chan which he has met many times. How could he fall in love with her too easily? Even I, who was supposed to be kind and proper, had a problem with processing this. Then again, it couldn't be Meiko-san.

She's made it clear while drunk in front of him that if anyone dared to hit on her, she'd shatter an empty bottle of sake on their head.

Though, I had to be sure. I didn't want Gakupo-nii to suffer such physical injury he did not deserve.

"Is it Meiko-san?" I asked.

"Meiko?!" he broke out into laughter. "You're kidding right?"

"Well, you're description matched her perfectly,"

"How could it possibly be that woman when she scares me to death when drunk?!" tears formed on his eyes as he couldn't stop laughing.

"Oh, that's a relief!" I smiled, "Then you won't be suffering any physical injury whatsoever,"

"I'm smart enough not to go near that woman much." He smiled.

"But if it's not Meiko-san, then who is it?" My curiosity retuned.

"Only I know," he smiled.

"But Gakupo-nii…! I want to know as well!" I pouted. He already saw me without my poise and grace. I may act as I please in front of this man.

"I'm not going to tell you," his smile remained.

"Then maybe you should confess!" I got up into his face and looked so sure of myself. _He has to confess! No woman would reject one such as him!_

It seemed the distance disturbed him a little and I moved a few inches back. _"Do you really think I should confess?"_

"_Yes!_ _No woman would ever reject you, Gakupo-nii!_" I smiled.

"_Well then, maybe I should," he smiled as he stood up and slowly tried to close the distance between us._ I nearly strained my neck trying to look up at him since he was at least a foot and an inch taller than I am.

"Will you really tell me?" I asked.

"_I'll let you know," I realized his lips were just inches from mine and were getting closer._ He doesn't mean—!

"_Did you know that you've caught my eye the first time I've seen you, Miku?" His lips brushed against mine. I can't let him do this! I was too young for him!_

Without a second thought, _I pushed him sending him a few inches back_. _My hands immediately came up to cover my lips as a pained expression scarred my face._ It never came to this point. I never showed this expression to anyone. Luka-chan told me to never wear this expression. It wasn't geisha-like.

_It also pained me to see Gakupo-nii's expression. Those cheerful eyes, that brotherly smile, the warm expression I've come to know and love were gone._

He stared at the grass and we were in silence for a very long time.

"_Gomena, Gakupo-nii," I smiled one I regret, "I'm only sixteen years old and you are twenty-four. I'm sure there are many other women out there. Besides, I merely think of you as a brother. I just hope you don't take this personally."_

I saw his lips twitch to one side and fell back into a straight line.

"_Right," he said, "What was I thinking?" He half kneeled in front of me and placed his hand on my cheek. "Goodbye Miku, I'm afraid I must go elsewhere," with that, I watched his figure disappear into the sunset._

_I hope I don't lose someone I care about._

I entered my house and slept. When I awoke the next day, I did my usual morning routine. When all that was done, it was usually time for Gakupo-nii to come in with a surprise but this time he didn't.

Maybe he's just busy. I mean, he was a samurai after all. People gave him jobs. I didn't take it too personally.

_Days passed and I waited for him to return but he never did. This saddened me very much. I did lose someone I cared about very much._

_It's been three weeks and he still hasn't returned_. Luka's wedding was in a week or so. I was excited though at the same time sad. If she got married then she'll be gone for at least a month. I already lost Gakupo-nii; I didn't wanna be left alone.

Then, my door slid open. I was surprised. Though, I knew the only person who could be able to do this.

"Miku, I haven't seen you in a while!" she called out.

"Meiko-san…? What are you doing here?"

"Eh, where's the samurai… Uhm, Gakupo, right? He's always here by this time." I had a feeling she had a lot of sake last night as well. The scent was strong.

"Meiko-san, please stop drinking so much sake, it isn't good for your health,"

"Who said I drank sake? Do I look drunk?"

"Then why do you smell strongly of it?"

"Some idiot spilled a bottle of sake on me," she looked annoyed, "Anyway, why haven't come to see Kiyoteru-nii yet? You want to follow in his footsteps, right?"

"Eh? What did Luka-chan say about this?"

"Well, she said it was about time you loosen up a bit. She won't be your instructor forever and she has to let you do what you want sooner or later,"

"She really said that?" a smile came across my face. I ran up and hugged Meiko-san.

"Hey, it wasn't me, it was her!" she smiled. I let go and she spoke again, "Here, I'll walk you to where my brother is,"

Meiko-san and I haven't had enough time to talk to each other lately. Mainly, it was because Gakupo-nii was too scared of her. I was always with Gakupo-nii. Now that he's gone though, I could go back to my normal life. _It was sad but I can't keep looking at the past. I have to think about my future._

I entered the place where Kiyoteru-sensei taught children.

"Oh Miku, you're here!" he smiled, "Class, this is one of my students, Miku. Be nice."

One of the children came up at me. She had black hair and was wearing pigtails.

"My name is Yuki, it's nice to meet you" she smiled. She then tugged on my hand and gestured for me to sit on a hair next to Kiyoteru-sensei's desk. I looked up at him and he just smiled at his student. I can infer that she was 9 years old.

I watched the whole day. Kiyoteru-sensei really had fun with these children. He would occasionally make me stand and take his place telling me what to teach them. It was nice to feel like I didn't need to act proper to be admired. I've never been this happy.

_When the day ended, Yuki hugged me and said, "I hope you come again, it was fun having you as our sensei!"_

This made me smile. _"I will definitely come again," I promised her._ She then left with all the other children.

"Kiyoteru-sensei…! That was fun!" I nearly jumped. I smiled my widest smile. It felt so nice!

He smiled as well. "My job has downsides but I enjoy it just as well,"

"Well, I guess I better get home then!" I smiled.

"I'll take you home then," he offered, "Maybe I could even give you tips on how to be a good teacher to these children. It's not that you need it though, you were amazing back there. You were a natural!"

"I was?" I was too eager and proud of myself to care about being proper.

"Would I be complimenting you if you weren't?"

_We walked the streets laughing as he joked occasionally while giving me tips on the profession I've chosen when I grow up. I definitely wouldn't change my mind. This was my goal. He was my role model. I had everything to be happy. I had best friends, a role model and a goal in life._

_I couldn't ask for anything more._

"Well then, I should get going now, Miku," he smiled.

"Thank you for walking me home!" I smiled.

"It was nothing. I have to get home now. Meiko is cooking dinner. I have to hurry before she burns it."

I giggled at that. Oh, Meiko-san, she truly was something else. He left and I closed the door. It had been a fruitful yet tiresome day. I immediately went to sleep.

When I woke up, I preceded with my usual morning routine. When all that was finished, I had my lunch. Then, what I didn't expect happened. _My door slid open revealing long purple hair complimented by the sunlight. There stayed a handsome smiling face._ It was Gakupo-nii!

"Gakupo-nii, you returned!" I was surprised and overjoyed as I ran up to him.

"Gomena, Miku," he smiled as he slid the door shut once again, "I had a few errands to run,"

"It's alright!" I turned around and faced the direction of my back door. We always went to my garden. "Come on, let's go to my garden!"

"Wait, Miku, before that, I have a surprise for you," the familiar smiling face I missed so much has returned. _I'm glad he wasn't depressed over that rejection issue. I'm glad nothing has changed between us._

"A surprise…?" My eyes widened as my smile grew brighter.

"Yes, I think you'll love this one most of all," he closed his eyes as his smile grew brighter as well.

"_I shall turn around then!" I immediately said as I did it as well. I always turned around whenever he had a surprise for me. He never ceases to get me the perfect gift._

I wondered what it was this time. _Was it sweets? Was it an accessory? Was it a new fan or umbrella? It didn't matter to me anymore. Things were finally back to normal!_

"_Gomena, Miku," he whispered, "Daisuki,"_

"_Eh?" I felt a line of pain on my back. My eyes blurred fast as took one last look at the figure behind me. I made out the color red and tears on the handsome face. I smiled._

_I guess I won't be able to keep my promise to Yuki after all. I hope she forgives me._

"_Gomena, Gakupo-nii,"_

_Deep darkness fell over me._


	4. Gakupo

It all began with one mistake.

I was happy. My childhood was very much enjoyed since she was there. Her smile, her lack of grace and her eyes were the best qualities she possessed. I even call her princess at times, although, sarcastically of course. It was fun while it lasted. Let me rephrase my second sentence. I was happy for a time. Though, it all ended the second I made the wrong choice. That choice was to leave the place we called home.

I don't remember her name, really. In fact, all I remember was the beautiful voice I was used to singing with. You see, aside from how I described her, she also had the most beautiful voice I've ever heard in the world.

We played together most of the time and strangely enough, she's the one that seems to end up dirty after some time. She's usually dirtier than me after we run around playing tag or something or whatever. She had always been there.

She made me feel warm.

I, Gakupo Kamui, am known for being a remarkable samurai. You see, I am simply the best this country could offer since I've been training ever since I was ten. I'm known as a travelling samurai though. I've been travelling ever since I've found out that she was gone and went to look for her ever since. If I didn't decide to leave with my father that day then maybe my life wouldn't be so messed up right now.

I came across a village one day. Well, I always come across villages. After all, that is my job. At first, I didn't think I'd stay there for long.

Well, not until I heard her voice.

I heard a girl singing. It was beautiful and she was singing a song that was so strangely familiar to me. It was the song my friend and I used to sing a long time ago. It had been so many years since I heard that song produced by another voice. That nostalgic feeling came to me and at last I was finally able to loosen up. I guess the song was still relaxing.

Yes, I was in love with my childhood friend. She was nothing near graceful. Absolutely not fit to be a geisha like the woman I heard singing.

She wasn't wearing make-up. Well, I don't think she'd need it. After all, she looked beautiful already. It was as if she was natural art that need not be painted.

My interest in her grew.

Her smile, the way she sang the song. It was too much of a coincidence. How could a young girl like her know that song? A smirk came across my lips. Maybe she's here.

I brushed off the thought.

She can't be here. How could she be here of all places? I'm pretty sure she's been travelling like myself and managed to come across this girl. She must've taught her that song, I guess.

Hey, is it okay if I move on?

I mean, this girl has surely caught my interest. She will always remain in my ribs—I mean heart. Yeah, that's what I meant to say. Sorry, I've been feeling "heart" is a little too overused, don't you think?

I'm sorry; I should just get on with it.

I was supposed to leave the village today in search for her but instead, I stayed a little longer and tried to make it look like a coincidence. I need to make up circumstances where I get to see her without having to follow her around. I would also love to hear her voice once again.

It's not as beautiful as my childhood friend's but its close enough. Besides, it's not like anyone's voice is better than hers— in my opinion, of course.

So, I took jobs and even found an inn to stay for a longer while. Maybe I'd even stay here for the rest of my life. It depends. Though, I didn't, really.

I found out her daily routine and I've seen her friends. One was a really beautiful and graceful woman with pink hair and the other was a drunken delinquent. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to insult her, I mean, she's beautiful too in her own twisted way.

Alright, maybe I should stop making side comments.

I was never gentle in any way. I'm basically a pervert, I regret to say but I put my job first of course. I have a colorful personality and I hate it when people forget about me. Though, I think I got over that since I wasn't around anyone too much to form serious bonds with them.

ARGH! There it is again! Okay, okay, I'm just gonna continue on with the first time I met her.

It seems she was supposed to meet her friend, the pink-haired woman and her lover. Well, I assumed he was her lover. She never told me otherwise.

She had a lot of fun and I finally mustered up the courage to approach her when they left and I saw her looking for something. I'm guessing it was her fan since it was a few meters from my line of vision. I picked it up and approached her.

Okay, take a deep breath. You have to act proper around this lady or else. Don't act like yourself and try calming down a bit. Your entire future depends on this moment.

Well, what really happened wasn't exactly what I meant but seeing it now, my entire future did depend on this moment.

"Are you looking for this, beautiful miss?" I say smiling like the gentleman I'm not. This was going to be harder than I thought. I could feel my face twitching. No, I can't pull this off. She must think I'm a weirdo.

She was silent and embarrassed. I could tell by the blush on her face.

"Here, let me help you up," I held out my hand for her. I wonder if she'll take it.

"Good sir, may I please ask a favor?" Eh? Good sir?

"What would that be, good miss?" I can't believe I was actually pulling this off.

"Please do not tell anyone about this. My image would be ruined if people found out that I crawled on the dirty ground." Eh? She's begging me not to tell anyone? I actually thought it was cute. I guess it was an embarrassing thing for her, huh?

I couldn't take it. I laughed. That was the most stupid thing I heard that escaped from her lips. Would anyone actually think that this would be pitiful? This might just work!

"I have no intention of doing that, beautiful miss," I smiled. Hey, I'm getting used to this! "All I want to know is your name." Please answer me and don't think I'm a sick pervert. This may probably be the first time I'm gonna hide that fact.

She isn't answering! Uhm… Uhm… I know! I'll tell her my name first!

"Forgive me, I haven't introduced myself," How the hell was I actually pulling this off? "I am Kamui Gakupo, you are?"

"Hatsune Miku," she replied, "I am a geisha,"

"And I am a samurai," Yes! Progress! "Shall I accompany you home?" Please say yes! Please say yes!

"Very well then, good sir." Eh? She actually agreed? "If you insist,"

Damn, now I have an urge. Suppress your perverted-ness, Gakupo.

And so I resisted my urge and brought her home. Okay, now I know where she lives! Time to make her love me! Well, I should probably get to know her more first.

I know! I'll bring her a present everyday! It'll be a routine!

So I went to her house everyday carrying sweets, hairpins, an umbrella or anything that might suit her tastes. In return, she would welcome me in her humble abode with a smile. She has shown her true nature to me. She reminded me so much of my childhood friend. She had absolutely no grace and poise when she was alone or dealing with her personal problems. Though, she was a lot kinder and gentler than my childhood friend, I can say that as a difference.

The more I got to know her, the more I fell in love with this sixteen-year-old lady. Her gentle smile and her voice remained imprinted in my mind.

Then one day, while I was in her backyard like our usual routine, she was tending her flowers. What surprised me was when she said, "Gakupo-nii… Is there a woman that caught your eye yet?"

I was drinking tea at that moment and nearly choked on it. She was actually asking me if I liked someone?! Whoa! That escalated quickly!

Stop it. Act like a gentleman. "Yes, there is one." I smiled. I was getting used to the gentle smile although I couldn't get rid of my twitching.

"Are you two getting married like Luka-chan and Kaito-nii?" Eh? So that's what she meant… For a second there, I thought she was actually asking me if she had a chance. She even sounded so enthusiastic about it. I sighed.

"No, she doesn't know of my feelings towards her," I said. What's the point of living anymore?!

"What?" she sounded surprised. Maybe I shouldn't overreact in my brain. "Why haven't you told her?"

I took a deep breath. Okay, be smooth, Gakupo. "Because I'm afraid," I replied, "I'm afraid she might reject me and I'm reconsidering of looking for someone else,"

"Can you give me a hint on her personality or appearance?" A hint…?! Won't it be too obvious if I do that?!

"Well," Think! Think! Uhm… Let's see… What's the least obvious part of her personality? "I'm afraid that she has a strong personality and faces her personal problems without poise and grace," I laughed. I hope the laugh didn't sound too… unreal.

She seems to have bought it. I hope… There was a long grueling silence. I can't take this anymore!

"Is it Meiko-san?" What?! Meiko…?! I suppressed a shudder. That woman is absolutely demonic especially when she's drunk! I may be a samurai but if I get her mad when she's drunk; I know I'm done for! She's going to give me unnecessary and nearly fatal physical injuries and I wouldn't want that.

"Meiko…?" I tried to laugh. "You're kidding, right?" I hope she buys it.

"Well, your description matched her perfectly."

"How could it possibly be that woman when she scares me to death when drunk…?" Just imagining her break my skull makes me cry but I didn't stop laughing.

"Oh, that's a relief!" Relief…? She actually said it was a relief! "Then you won't be suffering any physical injury whatsoever," Yeah, I'm thankful that she cares and that I'm smart enough to know that I should steer clear of Meiko as much as possible.

"I'm smart enough not to go near that woman much." I tried to smile. I could still feel myself twitch. I will not under any circumstances go near that woman.

"But if it's not Meiko-san, then who is it?" She's actually this curious? Maybe I really do have a chance! Wait! Wait! Wait! Try to act smooth.

"Only I know," I'm really not sure if I pulled that off well.

"But Gakupo-nii…! I want to know as well!" She's pouting! Oh crap…! She's pouting! Gakupo, resist the urge. Resist the cuteness.

"I'm not going to tell you," It's getting harder to hide my twitching.

"Then maybe you should confess!" What just happened?! A second ago she was over there, now her face is inches away from mine.

She moved back? Damn… Maybe I should've gone for it. "Do you really think I should confess?"

"Yes! No woman would ever reject you, Gakupo-nii!" I can't believe it! She thinks I'm attractive! Alright! Then I should! Well, I gotta be smooth with this.

"Well then, maybe I should," I stood up and slowly tried to close the distance between us. I'm gonna do it! She can't possibly reject me after saying that!

"Will you really tell me?" So cute…!

"I'll let you know," I began smoothly, "Did you know that you've caught my eye the first time I've seen you, Miku?" My lips finally brushed up against hers and in a split second I could see the horrified expression on her face as she pushed me away.

She just pushed me away. I don't understand at all! I thought she said I was attractive?

"Gomena, Gakupo-nii," My ears perked up as I heard that, "I'm only sixteen years old and you are twenty-four. I'm sure there are many other women out there. Besides, I merely think of you as a brother. I just hope you don't take this personally."

I feel like my ribs have been broken into pieces. My smile disappeared. My expression on that day when I found out she was gone twelve years ago. That blank expression haunted me to this day and I never thought I'd be doing it again.

I fell on my knees that day and screamed and I feel like it's happening again. No, I can't let it happen in front of her. As I fell, I stopped at one knee and stared at the grass for a good 3 seconds before I looked up at her and forced a smile.

"Right, what was I thinking?" I placed my hand on her cheek. "Goodbye Miku, I'm afraid I must go elsewhere," I stood up and left. I didn't know where I was supposed to be going. I just went on. It's not like it matters anyway.

I've only been rejected. It's not like it's the end of the world. Besides, I still need to find her. I found myself in the field where I first heard her singing. I was alone and the sun has set. I stared at the night sky above me.

I fell on my knees and started pounding the ground with my fist as I screamed.

"IT'S NOT LIKE I'LL FIND HER! IT'S BEEN TWELVE YEARS AND SHE HASN'T SHOWN UP! WHAT MAKES ME THINK I'M GONNA FIND HER NOW?! IT'S OVER! IT'S REALLY OVER! I CAN'T EVEN GET THE WOMAN THAT REMINDED ME SO MUCH OF HER! HOW CAN I GET HER OF ALL PEOPLE?" I stopped pounding the ground and let my fist rest on that very spot as my head fell on the ground. "If I hadn't left then she might not have left as well. If I hadn't left then maybe I wouldn't have fallen for Miku."

I remained in that position for a while. I would think of it to be a dramatic scene of some sort. Yeah, I guess it would be if I weren't so pathetic.

"Should I bring her a present tomorrow? Should I just be her oniichan?" I sat up and hit my head. "I don't know anymore!"

Well, I guess she was right with the fact that I was too old for her. I mean an eight-year gap isn't what you'd call little. I let my back drop onto the grass. Maybe I should think things through first. I should accept jobs for now. I've been a little behind on paying for rent.

Yeah, I should take it easy for a bit and return when I have enough money for a present for her again.

So I worked. I've hunted a few animals and sold them off. Then I went on some criminal's trail. He was a pretty easy catch. He was slow for a thief and had very poor swordsmanship. I got him with one swoop. Well, I didn't kill him.

You see despite my profession, you may find it hard to believe that I've never killed anyone before. Yes, I got into a lot of battles but I've killed none of them. I spared them all. They say I'm a sad excuse for a samurai since I can't dirty my hands with blood of the people I killed.

I was known and loved for my mercy and even if those other samurai say that about me, they still thank me for sparing them. I know many ways to render someone defenseless without killing them. I can say this at the least. I don't have the mental capacity to kill anyone at the moment.

If I somehow acquire that trait later in my life and begin to kill people even for a reason, then it'd be best if someone just sliced my head off.

Well, enough said about that dramatic stuff. I mean, I'm just telling you about me and it doesn't really make sense at all. I've made enough mistakes in my life already. This time, I'll be here for Miku as her older brother. I'm pretty sure my feelings for her will dissipate over time and I'll be happy if she finds someone near her age, of course.

I'm perfectly fine now! It's been three weeks and I should probably go to her house tomorrow. I paid off my rent anyway. I don't have a problem anymore until next month.

Well, the innkeeper said that if I did him a favor, he'd let me skip a month's payment. He asked me to bring sake for his him and his friends since they were gonna have some kind of gathering today. I accepted of course. It's not often I get an opportunity like this.

So I went to get his sake.

When I got there and was carrying a whole crate of it, I realized, "Damn! I didn't think it'd be this heavy!"

I struggled to carry it. Then suddenly some kids ran past me.

"Oi…! Watch it! I might drop this on you!"

"Gomenasai!" said a little girl, "We were running from the guy forcing us to pay him!"

"Pay him?" I was curious about this.

"Hai…!"

"Are you from the orphanage?"

"Hai…!" Then she was startled again. It must be the guy she was talking about. She ran away. I walked ahead to see what was going on. Besides, I can't run anyway, not while I'm carrying this.

Then I saw a guy probably my age. He was Luka's fiance. Perfect!

"Hey, can you carry this for me for a bit, I'm just going to check something out," I handed him the crate.

"Oh sure but—" I ran past him. He'll figure it out. He's a man too.

I saw some fat guy trying to squeeze some money out an old woman. "Oi, what's going on here?" Somehow, I managed to sort that out and got a tip from the old lady. This was a pretty lucky day. Well, almost.

"Hey! What the hell is your problem?!" I heard a woman yell. Wait a minute. I know that voice! I ran over to that direction and it was confirmed. It was Meiko! I'm doomed!

"Suimasen…!" Luka's fiance was apologizing to her and she was wet which meant…

I ran over to the crate and was relieved that only one bottle was gone.

"Uhm… T-thank you," I said awkwardly. I'm pretty sure he didn't hear me but at least I thanked him. Good luck, this is Meiko we're talking about! I'm pretty sure he's getting a beating by now.

Well, I got the crate safely to the innkeeper and I was relieved of one payment. I then went off to enjoy the rest of the day.

I know! Why not look for a present for Miku?

That's exactly what I did. It took me until afternoon and just as I was paying for it, I saw her. She was walking home with a man and she was… blushing.

Wait a minute!

I followed them from a distance where they won't notice me. Those eyes seem very different. I don't know the eyes of a woman in love but it seemed like that. The man she was with was Meiko's older brother which happens to be a year older than me.

My world stopped for a moment. She completely forgot about me. I was frozen just staring at her until she disappeared into a turn. I stood there motionless, speechless, any word with the less suffix.

I fell on my knees in the middle of the village streets and gripped my hair. W-what?! She rejected me because of our age gap or so I thought. She should've told me she wasn't interested in me in any way or is she toying with my emotions?!

No! I can't let this happen! Just when I was ready to move on…

Why would she do this to me? I don't understand at all! I shook my head violently and tried not to scream. People probably think I'm insane. I stood up and ran to my room at the inn and completely forgot about what I was supposed to give her.

Insanity, huh…? I stared into my own eyes as I pulled out my sword which displayed their reflection. If I can't have her then…

NOBODY CAN!

XXXXXX

I stood by her doorway the next day. It was around noon. A smile was playfully displayed on my lips. Then my hand made its way to her door and slowly began to slide it open. I stepped in and I saw her expression.

That cute face and innocent expression I've come to love and still love until now were all lies just like how I acted like a gentleman around her when I was a complete fool.

"Gakupo-nii, you returned!" She ran up to me surprised.

"Gomena, Miku," I said, "I had a few errands to run," it was the truth, of course.

"It's alright!" She seems more enthusiastic as ever. "Come on, let's go to my garden!"

"Wait, Miku, before that, I have a surprise for you," I said.

"A surprise…?" Her eyes widened as her smile grew brighter.

"Yes, I think you'll love this one most of all," I closed my eyes. Why was I here? What was I going to do?

"_I shall turn around then!" Then I felt an impulse._

"_Gomena, Miku," I whispered, "Daisuki,"_

"_Eh?"_

I wonder what I'm doing here, really. I have no reason to be here anymore. I didn't realize what I've done until the cloth I tied my sword with fell as it was drawn and blood was splattered on her clean floor. My heart tried to comprehend what was happening. I felt my ribs shatter. There she was, lying face down on the cold hard ground with a giant wound on her back.

That's when I felt my sword on my hand and I stared at it seeing the blood in it.

No! This can't be happening!

"Somebody, please just slice my head off!" I screamed as I fell on my knees pounding her floor. What have I done?! I crawled over to her body and turned it so I could see her face. It was beautiful and peaceful. She had a smile on her face. I wonder why?

I felt my cheeks wet. Strange, when did I start crying? I held her in my arms like that for awhile. My face inched closer and closer to hers but stopped in mid-air as my lips were inches away from hers. I didn't deserve that luxury—not after what I did.

I was just frozen there for a really long while. I didn't know too much time has passed and someone decided to open the door. Well, basically, I heard it sliding open.

My eyes widened. It was Meiko's voice! It was the woman that was scary as hell! If she sees what I did then she might not hold back and kill me!

I let go of my beloved Miku and took my sword and the cloth I used to tie it up with. I didn't realize it would slip out of my hand at the last moment. That purple scarf-sized cloth slipped out of my hand but I didn't realize it until I was outside through the window.

"Miku, my brother wanted to ask you if you wanted to come—"

When I tried to reach for it, she was already in shock from what she was seeing and all there was left to do was flee. No, I have to atone for what I've done! It wasn't on purpose! I swear! I ran to the inn where I was staying and to my room. I then curled myself up in a ball and began saying over and over, "I'm in a happy place! I'm in a happy place!" Why can't I do anything right? Why?! Why?!

Miku was gone and all because of Meiko's brother, and my stupidity. I finally looked up and realized that I'd been in that daze for hours. It was practically late at night. It was over for me. I will turn myself in tomorrow as soon as I see Luka! Yes, I will.

Besides, it's not like they won't already know it's me. I lay down on my bed and slept. Tomorrow was the day I lose my head. I will pay for what I've done.

I woke up early the next day. I decided to pack my belongings. I'll ask Luka to burn them after I die. It was noon when I decided to finally turn myself in. I then went out in search of Luka or at least Meiko. I know Meiko would kill me then and there so I probably might as well get over my fear of that woman.

Then I heard the news. I saw guards take him away as I was headed towards Luka's house. It was her own fiance and the piece of cloth I left was in one of the guards' possession. I froze as I watch them pass in front of me slowly as if they were tormenting me. They were absolutely tormenting me. My eyes were wide. I couldn't comprehend what was happening. I didn't get it at all. It was so slow. Everything slowed down and I stopped. My guilt was getting to me and yet when I think about the thought of death, I didn't want to die. I didn't want to die just yet.

I still needed to find her.

She was all I had left close to a purpose. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see his fiance crying as he moved further and further away from her. Was Luka the one who did this? Was she the one who thought it was him? I turned to her figure with the man of blue's apparent siblings. I remembered her saying they were his only family. I saw yet another woman cry. I tore a man apart from his young family. How much damage have I done?! She was just one girl and yet I… I destroyed so many futures…

I don't want to get hurt! I don't want to die! I still need to find her! But if I don't take the blame for all this then an innocent man will get hurt! That is not the way of the samurai of mercy and yet I'm overtaken by my fear!

I fell on my knees as I clutched my face my eyes wider than they've ever been. I expected my throat to produce a scream or even a yelp but all I've done seemed to make my mouth hang agape as my throat suppressed a scream on its own. Why wasn't I screaming? It would've been so much easier for them to find out if they heard me scream.

I felt like I was staring at myself from a distance. I could see my eyes tearing up. The hot fluid fell from my eyes continuously. My mouth stretched open to its limit and so did my eyes. I saw a man who has lost his purpose. I saw a man who was merely existence. I tried to reach out to him but I seemed not to be visible. The glint in his eyes was absolute insanity.

This man was not me. This man I see or I think I'm seeing since I can be on the brink of insanity at any second was definitely not and will never be me. This man was the residue of my existence. My soul was separated from my body and it seemed I was hallucinating.

I saw him take control of the existence I wanted to end. Stop! No more! No more! Please! This has to end! Slice his head off already! I'm already dead!

I have no meaning in this world. I was a failure. I couldn't even find her. That alone was enough reason to realize that the moment I made that mistake fourteen years ago my existence was unnecessary.

Then he got up. What are you doing you monster?! Don't dare use my body for anything inhumane again! I truly was insane. I don't even have control of my own body anymore! It ran. Where are you going you freak?! Come back here! Give me my consciousness back!

I ran after it. I wanted to see what that thing was going to do with my body. I felt like an outsider from my own body. It was like I was an entirely separate entity. I tried to grab it but it would just move past me. Did this actually signal the end?

They say that if you see your double that walks the earth just like you it would mean death but I didn't think insanity was another option. No! This isn't happening! I have to stop! I have to take control of my body again!

He went into the inn. What is he gonna do now?! I ran after him into my room and I saw him retrieve my sword. No. What are you planning to do?!

Then a smirk appeared from his twisted face as if he can see and hear me. He then spoke.

"I see now," said the meaningless body.

"W-what are you gonna do?" I stuttered.

"It wasn't my fault!" He held the sword up and I could see my own eyes reflected before me. He wasn't aware of my presence. "It was that teacher's! He stole her away from me!"

"What? Hey! Listen to me! You love Miku and you're guilty! It's your fault and your fault alone!"

He traced the blade with his free hand and it didn't face his eyes anymore but it did face his lips. That smile I didn't want to see from my own face. I realize now that I was the residue of my own existence. I was my subconscious. I was the only sane portion of my mind left.

"STOP…!" I kept yelling. I kept trying to take control of my body which wasn't going as well as I planned. He was still holding the sword in the palm of his hand. I had to move! If no one would kill me then I will myself! I saw him struggle from moving.

I was gaining control! I reached for a piece of paper and cut my finger as I wrote with my blood.

"It was me!

– Gakupo"

It was all I could write but at least I gave them something that would be the cause of what I was about to do. I smiled a sane smile as I saw this and proceeded with holding my sword to my neck as my hands shook. I needed to end this quickly and painlessly. Hopefully, someone would find me and realize what I did.

I realized then that the window was open. As I clutched my sword firmly in hand, the paper slipped away from the other and it flew out the window. No! I can't let it get away! I guess my suicide will just have to wait. Whoa, that just sounded so wrong in so many different ways I can't begin to imagine.

Good. I'm off to a good start. At least, I'm beginning to sound like myself again.

I jumped off the building and chased after the piece of paper. I dodged everyone. I didn't think I was out of it for too long. It seems to probably be two hours until dusk. I don't intend on anyone else reading it except Luka.

It kept on slipping out of my reach. What am I even doing anyway? Can't I have just let anyone read it? Damn, I should've written more. My trembling made me think unclearly. There also wasn't enough blood from my finger enough to write more.

One and a half hour left. I stumbled upon an isolated alley and I saw a man with glasses holding onto the piece of paper. It was him.

"Hey, can you give that back to me," I was slowly losing balance it was as if my world didn't belong to me anymore.

"Oh sure," he was walking towards me and the whole scene felt like it was in slow motion. "Here," he put the piece of paper in my hand as he walked past me. Then, as slow as everything got when I saw him here everything sped up as much as that. I didn't even realize that the blood and severed body parts that have been flying all over the place belonged to him until I was shoved back into being the sane subconscious. This was too much horror.

Blood was splattered everywhere. I could see veins and arteries from the severed body parts. His guts were flying everywhere. The glint of insanity in my eyes never was for description. There were no words to describe the horror I was witnessing right now. As his subconscious, I felt like vomiting. Though, I'm thankful I can't.

I was outside the loop again. Damn it! Don't do this! The existence was even tearing the internal organs apart and held the heart in the palm of his hand. His voice was too drowned out for me to hear. Stop it! Stop it! Just stop it! No more!

Tears were falling from my eyes as I screamed when felt like I fell on my knees. This is how I think I'd react usually since I can see the thing taking control of my body was, well, insane. IT added to the horror seeing my own face smiling at this sight. I was the merciful samurai or something to that extent. Where did all go wrong?

He was screaming something but I didn't wanna know anymore. I just wanted him to stop. He then took some sort of sack and jammed the poor man's remains there as he jumped over a wall and ran throughout the woods.

What are you gonna do now?!

Then we reached a river. No. He's not going to—

He threw the body into the raging water and began washing his hands. For someone insane, he was pretty smart, I had to hand him that.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! YOU'RE ME! LISTEN TO ME!" I kept screaming but this time, I'm sure as hell that his sanity would take more than a few screams to retrieve. Especially when those screams were from the sane part of his mind that he was too drowned out by insanity to even glance at.

It was over. He was never gonna see me again. I was just useless residue from this insane hollow shell of a body. It was all over. I could only watch as he returned. I needed someone from the outside to snap me out of it. I can handle them all hating me. After all, this was entirely my fault. It was all because of that mistake I made.

He returned to that very spot— probably to clean it up too. Wait a minute. There are kids there. Well, they look to be about thirteen or fourteen. They were Luka's fiancé's siblings! The soulless body walked over to them with an intimidating glare. Wait a minute. What was he gonna do?! These were children! They weren't involved in any of this!

"Len, look, dried blood," said the girl. She looked exactly like the boy. They must've been twins.

"Rin-chan, don't touch that—"

"Did you see anything?!" My body raised its voice.

What is it supposed to be doing?! THSE WERE CHILDREN WE WERE TALKING ABOUT!

"W-what do you mean by that?" the girl immediately took a step back.

"Listen here you brat, if you tell anyone about what you saw here, I'll kill you!"

DON'T DO IT! THEY WERE INNOCENT CHILDREN! Damn. I wish this body would listen to me for a change! Well, it's only logical for the sane portion of the existence to be narrating, right? Oh, sorry, I just broke the fourth wall, didn't I?

He pointed the sword towards her throat. I can't have him do this to innocent children! Then the boy stepped in front of her.

"I won't let you touch my sister," said the boy.

"Hmph," a smirk spread from the insane body's face. "Fine then," He raised his sword. No! No! No! Don't do this! Somebody! PLEASE STOP ME!

I was thankful. My cries have been answered. Someone just saw and had the courage to punch me square in the face. It threw me back a few inches. Just enough so I could hit the wall hard and it could make my body hurt.

"Don't dare touch them!" the glint of hate and anger were visible in his eyes as I looked up. My eyes widened in shock. It was him! Guards started to pull him along again. I was just frozen staring at him for a time.

"I… What have I…? I didn't mean to…"

I didn't mean to. Honestly. I didn't even realize what was happening. I was insanely desperate. I took a bag of firework powder and went inside Meiko's brother's room in her house. I involuntarily set it on fire. The moment I knew it was happening, I was already at the village gate running away.

The whole village was burning down. Tears fell from my eyes. I stood so far from the village as I watched it burn down. Now the village will die along with my sins. I was finally sane enough again. I have a feeling I'm getting more and more bipolar by the minute.

"Well, they're all gonna die anyway," I said as I stood by the riverbank. It was the riverbank where I threw Meiko's brother's remains that I mercilessly stuffed in a sack. "I might as well atone for what I've done. I hope Miku would forgive me on the other side."

I hurried while I was still sane enough not to change my mind. I was a threat to society now. I was insane. I could kill anyone at any minute. I held my sword over my wrist and cut it through the vein. I did the same with the other one then I threw myself into the river. It was a fitting end for one such as me.

XXXXXX

As light flooded through my eyes, I was confused. Maybe I didn't go to hell like I expected. I tried to rise. Maybe I was in the other world together with Miku. Though, my body was in complete and utter pain. My eyes adjusted and the blur was starting to fade away. I strained my neck as I looked at my own body. It was covered in cuts, scabs and bruises. The cuts on my wrists had bandages over them and so were the other bleeding parts of my body.

Then, someone entered the room I was in.

"Oh, you're awake," The woman's voice sounded sweet and soothing. "I was beginning to think you were never gonna wake up,"

"What do you mean? What are you talking about?" I struggled from saying.

"It's been a week since I found you from that river," she went to where I was and crouched down so I can see her face.

"Wait! You don't understand! You should've let me die!" I rose up which has done no good considering how much my body ached.

"Shh…" she pushed me down gently, "Rest for now, I'm sure you've been through a lot,"

"Where am I?"

"You're in our village, of course," she smiled, "The River you came from goes on very fast and is very long. Also, there is more than one current so there is no way of knowing where you came from or why you would want to die," the smile looked so sweet. It looked so caring.

"But I believe in only one thing," she continued, "All men deserve to live no matter what wrong they've done. If what they've done is truly horrible, they shouldn't atone for it by dying. That's taking the easy way out. They should live their life to the fullest and try their best to redeem themselves with their actions."

She was a new light that came into my life, my new chance of salvation.

"Oh I'm sorry for my rambling, may I ask you for your name?" the woman smiled and she was only inches away from my face. There was a faint blush on her cheeks complimenting her red eyes. Her pink hair was tied into two side ponytails and curled unnaturally. Well, to my eyes they were.

"Kamui Gakupo,"

"Oh I see!" she smiled, "What a really nice name!"

"And you are…?"

"Kasane Teto," She closed her eyes and inched closer, "I'm looking forward to being friends with you from now on,"

It was a miracle. There was actually someone left to lead me back to my sanity. I just hope I don't blow it this time or else. I better not let her find out about what happened to me before I got here since no matter how pure and sweet she sounded. I could never be too sure she'd let an insane murderer stay in the village she loves.

This is how I began my new life knowing no one else could've survived that fire that was near this village.


End file.
